Stud? What Stud? I don’t own a stud, do I? Wait a minute….I own three?

RaisingaChatBrat

This was sent by a friend of mine in response to reading the screen shots of “Simple Jack” the “special education” child who rode the “short bus” and “licked its windows.”  It’s about the best response I could ever think to come up with except to present the many examples of why it’s so true.

My older sister who raised what some might call a “special needs” child also posted it on FB as well.  For those who called me “snitch”, “narc” or “rat” for reporting that odious “Simple Jack” episode, I just did what I always do once I stopped fighting these battles with my fists as a child.

Words are just so much more effective.

If that’s one of the reasons why I’m no longer there and certainly no longer welcome, it’s one that I can most easily live with and wear proudly for sure.

Because my parents raised me right.  As for those  who behaved this way, those who watched and supported it with their silence.

Shame on you.

How do you say Amen? 

I’ve been in Chat for over a month at my new games and have yet to read a “retard” joke which  I had to say  is quite nice.

I was asked to review the below documentary that was picked up by CNN after Sundance and is in limited release nationwide but until I can get down to L.A. or Palm Springs, it’ll have to wait.

Blackfish

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I got in a fight once with one of my older brothers over killer whales. He’d come up from San Diego and just mentioned that he hated Orcas.

I asked him why.

He told me that Shamu had nearly killed one of his friends. It wasn’t the real “Shamu” which is now more of a trademarked brand name than a singular whale.   According to OSHA records, “Shamu” (actually two different Orcas) tried to kill him three times during his career as a trainer in what’s called the “Shamu Arena” the highest level for animal trainers at the Sea World parks.

It seems that the Shamus liked to grab their trainers by either the arm or the foot and drag them to the bottom of the tank, either holding them there or shaking them. Sometimes they like to release the trainer and ram into them after circling the perimeter of the tank.

He knows a couple trainers including this guy who survived an attack in 2006 (video included in article) who’d all experienced multiple brushes with death or serious injury. He said Shamu was about as smart as a fish because otherwise he wouldn’t be trying to kill his trainers.

I just told him maybe Shamu just doesn’t like his or her life as defined within the parameters of those who own him. The truth is there’s no way to ever really figure out why an Orca would do that, nor would the same “reasons” apply to every case.

Here’s an interesting photo taken of Kalina and her mouth. The broken teeth happen when she clamps her jaws down on the metallic bars of the gates that separate the different tanks from one another.  The drilled out teeth are partial root canels, meaning the pulp is removed and instead of putting build up in the empty spaces, they flush them out three times daily for the rest of the Orca’s life to keep abscesses from developing.

What does Sea World call this practice which is done on virtually all of its captive Orcas?

“Superior Dentistry”

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It’s also one of a myriad of reasons why most if not all Sea World Orcas could never be released to the wild. The closest candidate would likely be Lolita who’s about 40 but still “remembers” her pod’s particular calls.  But she’s experiencing the captivity problems including deterioration of her teeth. She’s in a singular tank rather than adjoining ones so hers is more from bumping and trying to gnaw concrete rather than clamp down on metallic rods.

Maybe partial release in a sea pen off the San Juan Islands where her pod hangs out. Being “residential” Orcas, they tend to stay pretty close there.

Incidentally, Kalina died in 2010 while in her teens. Rather quickly. You know, the fine on Sunday, ailing on Monday morning.

Dead by Monday night.

Below is an orca that allegedly died. I’m not which one this is or when it was taken. It looks like it’s in a show arena.
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This photo below is from 1989 at Sea World in San Diego. It’s Kandu V unattended and dying of a fractured upper jaw in her holding pool. She broke it “raking” against another female Orca named Corky II.  Witnesses said the blood spraying out of her blowhole was 10 feet high,  clearly not an exaggeration. It took her 45 minutes to slowly suffocate from blood spilling into her breathing passages and she sank to the bottom of the pool while an Orca show was taking place nearby.

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Corky II and Kandu V couldn’t stand each other. They’d been nearly at it for weeks and their animosity was completely caused by their close and involuntary confinement in captivity. Both whales were originally from different pods and more than likely would have never met in the wild. If they did, like man Orcas in that situation they would have simply given each other a wide berth.

But at Sea World San Diego, they spent time in the same cramped (certainly for an Orca) tank together.

Corky II lived for years in Marineland of The Pacific including when it was bought out by Sea World. The owners of Sea World had promised that Marineland’s whales would stay there but moved them to its own parks.

These whales are likely addressed in Blackfish which centers mostly on a male Orca named Tilikum who at 12,000 pounds is the largest Orca in captivity.  He was born in Iceland and captured at three.  He stayed there, did time in Sealand Park in Victoria, B.C.  up in Canada and then was sold to Sea World before Sealand went out of business.

Tilikum has also been implicated in the deaths of three humans. The only three known to have shared tank space with him.  He was under pretty tight restrictions while at Sealand mostly prohibiting “water work” which became even more so at Sea World Orlando though that was never really explained in detail to the trainers who worked with him including Dawn Brancheau.

So I look forward to seeing the film. In the meantime, here is Sea World’s rebuttal and the film makers’ response which I felt was pretty concise and effective.

I caught the site on the Joseph Hall case including the 60 Minutes special on it.   Joseph Hall was a 10 year old boy who shot his father, Jeffrey Hall to death. His father was a rising young star in the National Socialist Movement a neo-Nazi organization.  He was arrested and being prosecuted as a juvenile currently living in a high-security juvenile hall.  One of the issues with him is what’s called his Individual Educational Plan or IEP.  He’ll likely wind up in what replaced California Youth Authority (CYA) and be released by 25 back into society.  Disturbing, given that by 10, he’d shown signs of being sociopathic with a history of impulsive violence including in school that went totally unchecked.

Everybody was aware of Hall and his Nazi pals and besides protesting in an unofficial day laborer center, they protested in front of a Jewish temple during Sabbath services.  He went into politics, running for water board (seen as a springboard for higher office) and got 25% of the vote though he lost.

Here’s some of his buddies at one protested I attended with my woefully inadequate camera. A lot of people I knew were working as monitors.  The Department of Justice was monitoring it and the Community Relations department monitored a site where I covered the demonstrations.  I wound up working on a critique of the responses by the monitors as well as the police department including its SWAT team along with several other people in attendance.  Our analyses and recommendations were taken to meetings to better fine tune and make some changes in police responses to volatile demonstrations and crowd control situations.   That was quite interesting.

BarrierXisanJienearYumin

The above barriers used in that demonstration similar to above were probably seen as one of the biggest issues by most of us.   So they rethought how they’d be used in the future.

Anyway onto the Neo-Nazis.

nazis

Some more of his pals before the fight broke out between them and local folks with the Brown Berets jumping in, throwing rocks and such.  A bit of a brawl with some Black Bloc anarchists who always show up looking for a fight thrown in ultimately broken up by SWAT teams.

After that ruckus, the city sent a letter to Hall saying that from now on, if he and the Nazis protested, they’d have to pay for their own security.

RALLY4

Not long after that, I got a press release that a young man had been murdered inside his own home. When I saw the name, I did a double take. I contacted the person who sent me the release and asked if it was the same Jeff Hall.

The answer was yes.

The killer was his son, who the press said killed his father because there was an ongoing custody battle between him and his natural mother who lived out of state.  But there were allegations of physical and emotional abuse, some of which were raised by 60 Minutes.

Meanwhile…

When checking in at one of my games, I found this really sweet PM from a player asking me if I’d accept $2 million  if I’d let him breed to Henry Waldo Emerson.  I’m thinking wait a minute, I don’t own a stud. I didn’t buy one and then I checked my breeding barn and there was Henry Waldo Emerson getting fat and happy.  And he wasn’t alone.  I have three studs in my barn that just appeared.

Some very nice players had offered me up some horses and I’d clicked onto them and three of them were stallions.   It took me 10 seasons to get my first stud in the other game and I worked very hard at it. Nothing was given to me certainly not a stud but okay, I don’t think I’ll take the $2 million as I’ve got a ton of money and have just started spending it.

But it was pretty exciting I actually had a stud. Now comes the more embarrassing question. How the hell do you breed horses in this game?  It looks a bit more complicated and I’m supposed to give my approval of the mare who dates my stallion.

I’ll have to ask some questions about that.

I thought this was cute what someone sent.  One of those nice people on the edge of leaving to go elsewhere.  So frustrated that they can’t socialize on the game like they’d like but hey, you can just avoid it right?

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But what I found happening is that it was getting harder and harder to socialize with my friends on the old game because the majority wanted no part of either Chat or the Forum having experienced or witnesses so much bullying or nastiness there. The irony is that now that some of them are playing another horse game, that’s actually possible to socialize in that format now when it wasn’t really back on the old game thanks to the behavior of a relative few people.  I consider that one of those blessings in disguise.

It comes up in discussions of ways to counter that culture where the bullies get to enjoy everything and the people who either get bullied or just don’t like witnessing it are told to retreat away from all that.

My answer to that is that I can relate! I posted in the forum and used to have players come up to me and post silly things like that I was “nauseatingly boring” or “boringly tedious” just to be, nice?  I was a bit taken aback too when I was newer because it was pretty brazen not to mention rather immature and rude.  Then again, looking back, I realize there’s a reason for that. It’s because this person was allowed to do this multiple times to different people and get away with it.  I believe this poor child was even patted on the head as being extraordinarily clever a time or two because of it.

There’s people there who are friendly with a lot of people that you wish were in the social arenas more often because they were a positive presence there and it’s always nice to see that offset the negativity at least for a little while. Some of the “Chat Rats” knowing they’re outnumbered fade into the background or just leave with some fanfare because you see, sitting around, chatting and not having everything about bringing down someone else just isn’t their thing.

.  I got a bit weary when a certain male player who was allowed to trash talk about mostly female players in his blog (which otherwise proved a good read) AND promote his blog in the forum would trash female players including those who barely participate in Chat and who are very nice people. They were all players who specialize as much or more in the breeding side rather than the racing side of the game and some have been nominated in the breeding category and deserving so.

They sell their horses or give them away to people and they’re very nice!  But this male player moaned about how they were all “nags” or is so-and-so selling her nags again?  Hey, I was polite and said several times I didn’t appreciate that.  These are nice players who are kind to people and helpful and who don’t sit around trashing people and bullying people either. In fact, two of them were targets of that behavior themselves and no longer participate in Chat and the forum like they used to which is a real shame.  I think some other folks felt the same way when they got trash talked but didn’t say anything about it.  I mean when you come into a social arena to relax who wants to hear bitching and moaning particularly that where the target is always female?

Being a person who likes to socialize, when the nice people like that started to drop out of the social arenas, that’s when it started being less fun.  That’s what I heard a lot while asking people why they’d stopped showing up in those venues, some of them leave the game altogether. They’re not missed anymore than I am  so like me they’re better off for it.   I’ve run into some of them elsewhere and it’s been fun catching up. 🙂

Also when contacting people who were giving off signs they were leaving the game and finding out that some of the reasons (though real life issues are usually the primary reason) had to do with how they were treated and how complaining it isn’t worth the grief (pun intended) that you get in response. I can definitely advise ANYONE ever thinking of complaining about any bullying or similar behavior, don’t use the site’s griefing process and stay out of the social arenas like they tell you. Players can lie in the presence of concrete evidence that something took place and they’re still viewed as people with greater credibility. In the real world, it’s usually the other way around.

Below is to answer a question I got from some people about complaining about bullying and other rules violating behavior including the whole real money/points for fake dollars/horses rule or violations involving fake IDs and the “new” list. Should I use the complaint/griefing process to deal with it?

Using the griefing process as advertised just brought me grief and for quite a few players that’s been the case.  Especially when a kind player or two carefully pulled me aside and told me that that last one was done solely to appease the people who’d basically talked and joked about killing other people.  The people who were the targets of those jokes including about lynching were the subjects of the least concern in that entire process than I was but it’s better to know that because they should have been the highest priority rather than the bullies.  So I’ve had people ask me if the griefing process is worth using.

My answer is an unqualified no.  Not unless you want to up the bullying against you by the same folks and accelerate your departure from the site which believe me by the time that happens, will be a good thing.  I mean you’ve got people running around who are saying it’s all one big joke anyway, including in comments on this blog and these folks obviously got this information from somewhere.  They would know wouldn’t they?  I mean these are folks who can talk about bashing people’s faces in front of the admins as happened late last year  in Chat according to several individuals and not get suspended for it even to “appease” the complainants.

Complain? No, you don’t even want to go there.  Nice people are worth much better than that and there’s a lot of places that realize that.

Do you want to be concerned that someone with brass knuckles is going to “f” you up for doing it, gambling that this person isn’t some psycho bitch who’s whole life is the game and who might actually carry out a threat like that?  Why stick around and find out?  It’s not legal behavior to make comments like that but it seems to be just fine there which is really hard to understand including from a business standpoint.

spit

Anyway,  I remember thinking when I was called mind numbingly boring, wow this person must be very emotionally insecure. I wasn’t sure what to respond so I just responded civilly as I do  as I felt sorry for her. She never seems happy about anything.

I realized by this point that “flaming” like this by certain players who are almost treated as clever  for doing it  Just like the Male Blogger With the Free Pass to Bitch. I didn’t feeling too harsh because the first thing that came to my mind was pity  but I also realized that “flaming” even by one member of the “Chat Rats” pack didn’t occur without extensive discussion and navel gazing in Chat beforehand. That’s what they do, before they flame you on the forum, they have an ad nauseum bitch session about it in Chat.

Would I like to be privy to the lengthy discussion among the Chat Rats about me being ah, “mind numbingly boring” in Chat and how it was clearly an important PSA to post it in the forum.  Not really, I find trash talking in groups very boring and it’s just kind of cowardly behavior and there were two to three female players who just felt they had to turn every conversation that took place into them trash talking someone who wasn’t there.

Deep down you know that they know it’s wrong and maybe ashamed of it because if they were so righteous (rather than self-righteous in some cases), they’d trash talk players, bully them and tell “retard” jokes during special events nights in Chat.

But they don’t. They spend their time instead pulling a 180 and pretending to be nice people. Even to the people they beat up in Chat…or trash talk.  I saw that happen with the girl they call “Debbie Downer”.  Admin walks in, they all compete with each other to see who can kiss “Debbie Downer’s” ass the most.

Amazing.  So yeah they know their behavior is not appropriate behavior.  Incidentally the player they label “Debbie Downer” is a sweet woman who’s fun to talk with, the problem is you have to do it one on one due to how they treated her in Chat.  That nickname and the rest of what comes with it is just clique driven bullshit.

One male player actually speculated whether she’d spiral off the deep end if her horse lost and some speculation about whether or not she’d kill herself.

Disgusting.  Only a couple people laughed. It was a good day in Chat.

I thought about this while in Chat yesterday talking with people, posting in a couple forums and just being so thankful that I could post without someone following up by saying that it was incredibly painful, boring, an unacceptable ordeal that led to pain and suffering to read any post longer than one short paragraph. One of those charming players who had allegedly threatened to beat another player up  several years ago who played “SIM Police” once wrote that she didn’t read anything longer than two paragraphs.  I think I wrote back that I felt sorry about that but I was born in the generation before immediate gratification, sound bytes and text messages.   It’s refreshing to have a discussion as mature adults without flaming, people showing up just to snark because they really have nothing else, certainly nothing better to say and to not have to be subjected to that when you’d rather just chat with grownups.

So as a reflection of that episode, here’s the following quote, a variation of what I learned growing up that the hallmark of a boring person is someone easily bored.  I find the whole “bored” thing puzzling being one of those lucky folks who very rarely is bored myself. I can always find something to be interested in and I was kept too busy growing up to be bored for long.

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I was thinking in Chat when we had a really good discussion going the other night, the kind I wished happened in the other Chat and sometimes it did. Mostly when the Chat Rats took a brief respite from their habitation of Chat and weren’t the dominating force in the room.  I never walked in Chat when they were there really have a sense that they’re interested in anything anyone else had to say instead of like most mature and polite adults, they didn’t keep that to themselves.

I mean there’s certain Chats that I found boring and tedious like Male Player #1 giving Male Player #2 a blow job (which led to one male character being called “BJ [insert player name]” including at times under 18s were in the room. When you have minors or suspected minors certain topics shouldn’t be discussed because for one reason, you never know if the ‘rents are reading these Chats too. Call it luck if none of parents complained but one thing about luck, it usually runs out.

But I was perplexed by the whole ooohing and aaaahing over “BJ [player’s name] giving another male player a blow job. I was like, okay this has gone on for 30 minutes, next topic?  But most people in Chat just ever left or likely found other things to do not really being interested in the topic of man on man blow jobs. And day after day, the whole Blow Job theme kept coming back into Chat like it was the greatest thing ever.

I mean I grew up near West Hollywood before it became West Hollywood so I just didn’t find this all that interesting, steeped in part on its apparent novelty or view as some taboo topic.  All these women talking about how titillating male on male blow jobs were and not a single one of them was asking these men for advice on how to give a good one which is what comes up a lot in similar conversations in mixed company after a few drinks.    I thought what’s wrong with these girls? 😛

So yeah, this is a boring topic but it seems more appropriate just to wait until it’s done talking about it rather than to bitch and moan that these folks are mind numbingly boring.

That’s just so silly.  And watching them talk how player so and so’s the anti-Christ for the thousandth time is so much more interesting?

I have to hand it to “She’s the Anti-Christ” player and some others for sticking around and playing as long as they have when there’s a clique of players who thrive on making it clear how much they hate you and guess what? They’re given the playground to do that in, without anyone telling them not to hate on players the way that they do.  Takes more guts I guess to stay than it does to pack up like you’re all cool and tough and pick on that person.  I mean most people stay away from the forum because it’s clear that some folks can’t break wind on the game without it 1) being discussed and ranted about ad nausea in Chat and 2) After they get tired in Chat, usually about one or two people will go over and try to pick a fight with her.    What’s interesting though is most of the “targets” in Chat are people they already ran out of Chat.  I guess it’s not as much fun for the clique unless they can still find a way to pick on those people.

Someone commented on how this plays out and I said that’s what happens. I know when I take Chat “breaks” but still post on the forum that certain folks show up to snark on the forum, usually in passive aggressive fashion.  You can’t even mourn the death of someone in your family without them coming at you and guess what?  Your grief for a death in your family is just something else for them to laugh and joke about or “spit at their computer” because it’s just too damn funny.

So if you’re not in the clique and you experience any tragic event, keep it to yourself because if you post about it, invariably it’ll be part of some Chat circle jerk at some point. And I’ll tell from experience, it’s not fun to walk into that and after having done so, it was much easier for me to understand why Chat parties celebrating members’ departure and ouster both happen and are allowed to happen.  It’s kind of stupid but it is what it is unfortunately.  What will happen is that you’ll be blamed essentially for posting anything and the people who use it for circle jerk fodder won’t be held responsible at all, after all they couldn’t help themselves.

I still have a bit of struggle understanding what makes ilk like this so desirable to have around that but then that’s probably a good thing. 🙂

Still I get some comments and questions about it even now.

This one’s one of my favorites.  🙂

Illtakehimanyway

And finally:

Football season’s still a ways off. Plenty of time to work on that slip and slide. 😛

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About Butterfly Collective

I'm just an ordinary person doing ordinary things in a not so ordinary world
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